Tongue-tied n Twisted

According to latest reports coming in from England- The Home of the English language, it is believed that William Shakespeare, with the culmination of the India-Pakistan cricket series, completed a full 360 degree revolution in his grave.The presence of eminent English speaking citizens of Pakistan - Rameez Raza, Imran Khan and Waqar Younis - in the TEN Sports commentary team is reported to be the cause of this 'turn around' by Shakespeare. Rameez Raza, who holds the record for topping his class in English for four consecutive years from the 2nd standard to the 5th standard, is believed to have put The Bard on the 'move'. Raza, a die-hard Pakistani supporter who once famously commented in favour of Pakistan in a South Africa Vs West Indies match, was, like always, available for 'comment'. "This (shakespeare turning in his grave) is the acknowledgement of the English of mine by the William Shakespeare himself", said the former Pakistani captain, amidst ...

A rather verbose email written by Pakistani captain Inzamam-ul-Haq to his mother was today leaked to the press by sources from the only cyber cafe in Peshawar. A copy of the email is available with this reporter. The email talks at length about the ghastly appeal by the machiavellian Indian cricket team whilst Inzamam was busy displaying his copybook front foot defence to a 'delivery' bowled by Suresh Raina from practically the other end of the ground. The following are excerpts from the email. "Greetings Mother, Your son Inzamam. Other day I and 10 others are playing a game of cricket with 11 others from India. Therefore 1 + 10 we are 11. We are being very honest sporting peoples. But the Indians are corrupt and unsporting people. Yesterday, Mother they are appealing even when I am teaching them how two play forward defence stroke. Mother, you know I am very bright child since childhood but I am not understanding the rules of cricket. When I am playing England I am out fo...